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Don't Market Your Business Like Tim-nice-but-dim's Evil Twin

Last week I was working happily at my desk when the phone rang. I broke off from what I was doing and the conversation went something like this:

"Hello, Jason Rudland Speaking." I said.

"Yah, can I speak to Jason Rudland?" The caller said in an oddly aggressive Tim-nice-but-dim voice.

"Speaking."

"I've got some information on investments that are growing very fast." blah, blah, blah. "Fine wine." Blah, blah, blah. "Bloody massive returns." Blah, blah, blah. "If I send this to you, will you read it?"

"What?"

"Will you read it?" He said with irritation.

"I don't understand what you are offering me?"

"It's an investment."

Now I could have a little fun. Having worked at a stock broking firm for many years, I am very aware of compliance regulations for investments. This guy should not be cold calling me offering an investment. I'm not sure, but I suspect that includes fine wine.

"An investment." I said. "Are you regulated by the FSA?"

"We don't need to be regulated by the FSA, we are regulated by" blah, blah, blah. "If I send you the information are you going to read it?" In a thinly-veiled-anger tone now.

"No. I am not at all interested in any investments." I'd switched off the alarm-bells ringing in my head, as they were not telling me anything I didn't already know.

"Why?" His tone switched from anger to dumbfounded-at-my-stupidity.

"Because I recently saw a TV program which exposed fine wine investments as a scam." I said.

"Well, all industries have the good and the bad. All I want to know is..."

"It's not your fault." I interrupted, "I don't know enough about wine to know if it's a scam or not. Therefore I cannot invest."

Click. He was already dialing the next punter.

Now, I'm not much of a gambler, but I'd bet this was a scam. However, it did make me think how terrible it would be if they were a genuine business. Tim's evil brother with his quasi-posh accent, oozing arrogance, could just be making the wrong impression. His pushy attitude could simply be ignorance.

They could have handled it so differently. Not set off any alarms. They could have been my trusted investment advisor.

Presumably he thought I had tens-of-thousands of pounds to invest (which I understand these fine-wine scams require). Maybe I should be flattered I was on his radar? However, if I really was in the market for an investment, I would be Googling to research where to put my money. I would certainly have been curious about an eBook called "How to build a successful fine wine investment portfolio."  I would have downloaded it and read it. No need for "If I take the time and effort to send you some information, will you read it? Will you? Will you?"

If the eBook made sense and the investment was a fit for my attitude to risk, I'd not mind if I got some more emails from them. In fact, I may look forward to them. Suppose those follow up emails taught me more about how to spot a good investment wine, or maybe invited me to a fine wine investment webinar. Sure, I'd be up for it.

Eventually I'd be calling them with my cheque book in hand. As long as I didn't encounter Tim's evil brother (there no place in sales for arrogance and pushiness in my opinion.) Instead, if I got to talk to a trusted advisor, who was simply there to help me achieve my investment goals, I'd now be the proud owner of some wine I could not drink!

The moral of the story: People buy on the advice of trusted advisors. Inbound marketing allows you to become that trusted advisor.